The New 90210

And here it is, the promotional trailer for the CW’s New 90210.

Don’t worry, there’s a lot more commentary coming on the CW’s new teen soap, but a few preliminary points.

1) As the Fug Girls point out over at The Cut, the CW is clearly trying to capitalize on the Gossip Girl buzz by moving it out to California. And while I fully support the proliferation of greatness, the fact that the CW people and the Fugs see 90210 as a GG inspired product, instead of a near carbon copy of The OC just shows how short our collective cultural memories have become. After all, what’s Gossip Girl if not The OC in New York? I hardly need to regale you with how many plot lines, and even some dialog, that they straight stole from their West Coast forebearers, but we all know GG’s lineage. But of course, the OC was nothing more than a 21st century 90210 (The Flaming Lips at the Peach PIt, Death Can at the Bait Shop), so maybe it’s all come full circle, or something like that.

2) Just as Bill Clinton was the first black president, so was Ryan Atwood the first black teen soap star. Sure, he was actually uber-caucasian, but as far as teen soaps, he was the “black guy.” By which I mean he was a poor, socially awkward outsider who is only able to live in a glitzy neighborhood because of the charity of some rich dude. And in a shockingly progressive move, 90210 has a black guy play this role. Now, is it better for race relations that the one black character on a teen soap is a poor, criminal outsider as opposed to just simply white washing out all ethnic diversity from the show?

3) Has any actress been typecasted faster than AnnaLynne McCord? She’s playing Naomi the (Jewish?) rich, evil, queen bee type. For those fans of Nip/Tuck, you’ll recognize her as Eden Lord, the sociopathic teen femme fatale who seduces Sean McNamara by asking him to reconstruct her hymen. She of course goes on to (spoilers) corrupt Sean’s daughter, get sent to rehab, poison and then shoot Sean’s wife. The 90210 trailer, however, just makes her seem rich, promiscuous and bitchy – not clinically insane – so maybe it will be something of a change.

4) I’m sorry, Lori Laughlin, but 90210 is hardly breaking new ground by making a hot mom with an interesting social life a major character. Lori, I watched Julie Cooper, I feel like I know Melinda Clarke, and you madam, are no Melinda Clarke.

5) This is going to be the best show on television for one reason and one reason only: JESSICA WALTER IS BACK!